Rules to Being a Really Lousy Leader                                  by Mark Oristano

Rules to Being a Really Lousy Leader by Mark Oristano

Bad leaders have something over the good ones. Bad leaders have much better job security. Why? Simple. They run off anybody who is a threat to them before any damage can be done. Bad leadership is an art form. It’s not easy to make yourself into the kind of leader who nobody wants to follow anywhere. And because this underrated art form and the job security that goes with it are seemingly in great demand… here are Five Rules for Lousy Leadership!

WHAT’S RIGHT IS WHAT I SAY IS RIGHT!

A very simple way to let everybody know, right out of the gate, that there is only one person at the top, and that person is you. Your genius, your organization skills, your foresight and intelligence will take you on to new heights, despite your team’s ineptitude. From the start you simply tell them, “It’s all been carved in stone. I speak. You agree.” It’s amazing how effective a weapon this can be in your Lousy Leadership arsenal.  You ever see those shows about Buckingham Palace, and how the help all stops and bow their heads whenever a royal walks by? Well, that’s how your people will be whenever you walk down the hall. Or, better yet, whenever you burst into a room and yell out, “Who’s working hard today?” Just the sort of thing to make their little hairs on the back of their insecure little necks stand on end.

KEEP THAT GREAT PLAN YOU MADE ALL TO YOURSELF

Somewhere deep in your desk drawer, although you’ve likely forgotten where, there is a copy of the master plan you drew up for the company. Well, the master plan the vice-presidents drew up under threat of loss of parking spaces if they ever deny you wrote it. It’s probably really a pretty good plan. Take the company forward, get everyone on the same page. But it involves a true terror for a Lousy Leader. To implement the plan, one department must know what another department is doing. And you can’t have that. So when you are asked about the plan you say, “Yeah, we have a plan. What great business doesn’t? But if I want you to know what’s going on in another department, I’ll tell you what’s going on in another department.” Quick about face and back to your private dining room.

IT’S NOT A LIE IF YOU BELIEVE IT

Your people know you to be a person of impeccable honor. (Right!) They must trust you because, to a large degree, you never have any interaction with them, so they must believe you are doing the top job just brilliantly. On those rare and unfortunate occasions when you find yourself forced to mingle, at a staff meeting, at the all too rare awards handouts or, god forbid, on Pizza Friday, there is a simple way to let everybody know that everything is alright. When called on to speak, just take the mic, fake that sincere look and say, “People – one thing is always true. You know I would never lie to my family!” Look out over their faces, bask in the warmth of their admiration for you. Quick about face and back to your office, door closed as always.

IT’S VERY SIMPLE REALLY

So many unknowing people think that leadership is a terribly difficult task to master. To get to that seven-figure salary level must take years of climbing the ladder, finding a mentor, and so on. However, you know the truth is that even though others helped you out (now and then) you made the climb on your own. There’s nobody to thank when they come to interview you for Forbes or Fortune. All the admiration is aimed at you because you did it your way. And now, at the top, you pass along this key piece of wisdom to your people. “I gave you your orders. Now carry them out.” Magic words that put you and your management style in sharp focus. And the great thing is, if you give them orders that are lousy, and they carry them out… then it’s their fault for doing a lousy job!

MAKE SURE EVERYBODY IS SCARED OF YOU

This last one is so obvious, it’s almost shameful to list it for you. The greatest motivator of all… fear. If you can arrange the office so that the mere sight of you makes breath catch in your people’s throats, you’re on the way to becoming a Lousy Leader. Everything else is small potatoes next to this rule. Tell them if they want a friend to get a dog. Nothing… NOTHING succeeds like FEAR.

OK, so sorry this isn’t written in the Sarcastica font. Nobody sets out to be a lousy leader. Some people can’t help it because it stems from their personalities. Some people fail because the training they got was woefully inadequate. Some can’t cut it because they are afraid of leading others. And some just think they’re naturals and they become General Patton-2.0, they want their people to feel the fear.

(SPOILER – IT DOESN’T WORK!)

About the Author:

Mark Oristano has distilled the leadership lessons he learned in 30 years as an NFL broadcaster into a concise, complete course in leadership with principle. Lessons learned from his years in the front office of the original Dallas Cowboys makes compelling, yet easy to implement, rules for solid leadership. For more information, please visit: https://markoristano.com.

 

Teaming Up for Takeoff; Six Strategies That Are Out of This World

Teaming Up for Takeoff; Six Strategies That Are Out of This World

Six men and I sat atop four and a half million pounds of explosives waiting for the fuse to be lit to begin our flight on the Space Shuttle Discovery.  We knew that for the next seven days our lives would depend on our acting synergistically.  If anything went awry during the flight, if we didn’t work together, we might not make it home safely.

How did we come to that moment in time?  We had been selected for the Astronaut Corps and this particular flight because we had proven track records of being good team players, both as leaders – and as followers – and had the requisite skills to accomplish a variety of space missions with varying payloads.  Many of the skills I learned about teamwork are applicable to any group coming together to accomplish their goals.  Here are some of the specifics.

Everyone has been a part of a team at one time or another whether it be on the playing field or at the office, or even in your own home.  Can you recall a mediocre team, a terrible one or a lazy disorganized one? There are strategies to choose team players, to mold them into a great team, to define their goals, to motivate them for success, to deal with “outliers” and to learn from failure – and success.

CHOOSING AND DEVELOPING TEAM PLAYERS 

When you are considering putting a potential team together or adding new members to a current team, the interview process is crucial.  Do applicants have the requisite skills or must they be trained?  You should consider whether each of these people has experience working well with similar teams.  Can he or she give examples of types of projects those teams have worked on and how success was achieved?  Also be sure your current team feel comfortable with this candidate.

MOLDING A GROUP OF PEOPLE INTO A TEAM 

Not all groups of people can come together to form a great team.  You’ll find natural leaders, potential leaders and excellent followers who will carry the ball down the field for the rest of your team.  Each of them has a role to play.  It is up to your leadership to learn the competencies and capabilities of each one of them and how to put them to the best use to accomplish the work that needs to be done.

DEFINING TEAM GOALS

Your team will only be effective if there are clear cut, well-defined goals which all of the  team members understand and are willing to work toward.  The role of your management or team leaders is to be able to state these goals precisely and make sure the team understands and is on board with achieving the goals.  Your leadership should take responsibility for monitoring progress of the group and each individual.  Should the goals of your team change, all team members much be briefed so there is clarity going forward.

RECOGNIZING WHAT MOTIVATES YOUR TEAM 

It is imperative that you understand what motivates the people on your particular team.  For some team members learning new skills, a sense of accomplishment or a feeling of success will be the best motivators.  Others may value the opportunity for advancement or recognition. Financial rewards, raises or prizes may work in your company.  Often the praise of their fellow members is sufficient.  Have you considered a little friendly competition?  Only by asking the team members will you find out.

DEALING WITH OUTLIERS

What if one of your company’s team members is not performing well or is ill-suited to the team, making the workplace uncomfortable and jeopardizing success?  Can you show data that his or her performance is not up to the standards you have set and expect?  What about negative reports from coworkers?  A frank in-person discussion about these issues is crucial and it is imperative you solve the problem or let the person go so as not to poison the morale of the entire team.

PRACTICING AND LEARNING FROM FAILURE –  AND SUCCESS 

When things go wrong, it is imperative that you seek to learn all the causes and fix them right away.  You must also be sure that team members learn from the failure so the same mistakes are not repeated.  Never forget that learning from success will make your team and your outcomes better, too. Incorporate processes or procedures that worked well in the past and be sure to recognize those team members who made significant contributions to the achievement.

Teams of all sorts are ubiquitous.  Whether at a work site, on a sports team, in a nonprofit organization, or in a hospital operating room (or in today’s world, virtually or in-person), teams are everywhere.  Undoubtedly you have been a team member and perhaps had the opportunity to be selected or hired as a team leader.   Great teams that produce superior results are built following the following simple principles that lead to outstanding teamwork.  You must:

– choose and develop great team members

– mold them into the best team for your organization,

– define your organization’s goals,

– motivate the team appropriately,

– deal with problem team members,

– learn from success and failure

And you’ll find you have built a team that is out of this world!

About the Author:

Dr. Rhea Seddon is a renowned speaker, Astronaut and the author of “Go For Orbit”, a memoir about her adventures spending 30 days in space aboard the Space Shuttle.  She is also a former surgeon, healthcare executive and entrepreneur.  Dr. Seddon speaks to audiences of all kinds on the topics of teamwork, leadership and taking advantage of opportunities.  Visit www.RheaSeddon.com.